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Jag sätter ner kassen på trottoaren och tittar på huset tvärs över gatan. Jag har gått här många gånger tidigare och självklart vet jag att husets ena hörn avslutas i ett torn. Fönstren är små och sitter långt ner. Taket är en praktfull grönärgad kupol som kontrasterar mot de andra husens fyrkantighet.

Treåringen blir vild. Hon springer runt runt därinne. På den vitkalkade väggen växer gräset och vassen fram. Där mellan stråna glimtar tigerns ögon. Flickan stannar och möter djurets gula blick. Så är hon inne i väggen. Hon sätter sig med uppdragna knän och känner hur tigern makar på sig. Hon lutar sig in mot styrkan och mjukheten. Hon drar in doften och är alldeles lugn.

Jag lyfter upp kassen och går vidare.

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Publicerad 2024-04-29 14:13

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Elsa Wik
Mkt fin!
2024-10-27

Live2Dream VIP

om du vill att jag bara ska tänka på dig så lägg till mig på messenger. annars är du en kålsupare. jag är 110% dedikerad om den andra också är det. det räcker inte med ett kort meddelande per vecka.
2024-09-18

Live2Dream VIP

thought even more things. but when i turned on the comp it all went blank. i thought of these over and over again so you surely got em.

you can read my soul. so you know all about my past. and i cant lie to you. you dont seem to be transcended enough to know about my previous lives or can see my future. but thats ok.

anyway. redheads are from middle earth. only way to explain that we cant handle the sun. right. i probably said this.

so you can handle me. the main thing seems to be that you dont like yourself. which is the best thing ever. then you always try to be better. instead of settling down and decaying.

anyway. as for your brain not healing. thats because youre only in the fifth dimensions. in the 4th you are only a shell.

this can come from your parents divorcing when you were very young. but also later. or related to siblings disappearing. murder. rape. verbal or physical abuse. just seeing a terrible act.

shock. trauma. like to the head. or losing your job or getting less money or being demoted. or losing your apartment. or spouse. or someone close to you dying. or something bad happening to them.

it can also be repressed memories. which are obviously even more shock and trauma. so the brain hides it. but you still feel it. deep inside. you just dont know it.

and working too hard and sleeping too little. and not being in nature enough.

and too much electronics.

or a bad dream. or movie. or novel. or photo. or bad news about how the world is going to end.

or psychopaths or stalkers ruining your life. without knowing at first. surveillance.

so. havent had despair for months. except when i do it heals me. which is just because the vampire entities that try to control me dont get any energy. and they drag me down with it.

without the toxoplasmos parasite people arent creative at all. or have any deep thoughts or even an inner dialogue. nor advanced emotions. just slaves. for the annunaki. homo erectus and homo neanderthalis were highly advanced. they had farming all the way back 300 000 years ago. and tools. and language. written too. runes.

until the mid of the 1800s they still lived all over the world in the wilds. but then there was a great reset. which is slated to happen in 2021 or latest 2030.

so im trying to fight that. the nanochip healed me. so for ½ year i was just on bitchute all day.

then someone mentioned twitter. talked about the same thing there. then i was trolled heavily. and i tried battling the troll. and lost. then i died. tomas died. and sofia came forth.

anyway in 2016 one person started saying bra jättebra all the time. then another. now everyone does it everywhere.

now the psychiatric system cant get to me. they were here the other day and told me what a bad person i was in a plethora of ways. but they had no ability to force me into meds or injections or putting me in the hospital.

i havent really figured out the reason for this. maybe its when i met you.

and they also say toppen now. only women. if my hair is a certain length they constantly spam me with "du har så långt hår". eventually i give up and just shave it all off. no one anywhere says toppen then. not against others not on youtube not in comments online.

again this is because i shift to my female state. and people cant handle that.

the same for jättebra bra. its to make me hate anything about being female.

anyway i know to others im just like i perceieve others. a braindead zombie robot with no deep thoughts and only thinks of sex and spams the same things over and over again and dont make any sense at all.

anyway ive been working too hard lately. i realized it but then i overdid it even more.

even tried using a phone yesterday for ½ hour. figured i was immune and nothing bad sould happen.

this lowered my frequency. and im sure without it youd never said anything to me again. or just pretended to like me or only been positive.

or it woulda happened and i wouldnt have cared much for what you said.

so unfortunately i need to get despair. its not fun.

"det är bättre att må som piss ibland än att må som skit hela tiden".

ok my arm is hurting too much so i cant write more. fibromyalgia.

ive also stopped with coffee so i guess its out of my system now. and i cant smoke indoors. i was thinking of el cigg but even if it was good for me my room would smell like shit eventually and over time it would just make things worse.

i used to smoke 1 puff of a cigarill once per week. it worked perfectly. removed demons and OCD and i wasnt afraid of the dark anymore.

then i made the stupid mistake of smoking outdoors. baam. everyone around started begging for cigs. money too. and food.

never gave anything back. for a year. then when i felt shitty enough they gave me a few things. just to save me. acting like angels. to get karma points. thats the problem with christian society.

same with somatic care and psychatric care. if you feel like shit and know its gonna get worse they wont care at all.

when youre at your lowest they come to rescue you. except then they just make it worse. and make you dependant on pills which just make you sicker.

ok. will do something else now.
2024-09-18

Elsa Wik
Nära nära känns texten.
2024-09-13