I'm not one
who can
give as good
as he gets
sometimes
somehow
you were
diminished
in my eyes
today
you lashed
out at me
when I
was one of
your biggest
supporters
one who cares
I guess heroes
are bound to fall
and are unmasked
you strode around
like a crazed King Lear
and I wanted to be
anyplace but where
you were
you apologized as
fast as you damned
kind of schizo
kind of sad
I went home and
took a shower
to wash away the day
but it still seemed to stick
an insidious pain making
me sick and grey
I'm not gonna take the
victim role for long though,
it feels like I'm whining
out of control
Will you ever be
re-enstated in my head
or will I
a carry a grudge
until you are dead
and why do I have so
many feelings that
I judge
I just feel I didn't deserve
what I got
Damn you
maybe it goes back to my
father, who often showed his
anger and disfavour towards me
and only reconciled on his death bed
hours before he would succumb
and send me on this Odyseey of numb
when will it be to my Ithaca and Penelope
I come
ok, maybe it's all just inside my head
can I medicate it away?
can I shake it away
can I scream it away
can you take it away
or will it just lie in darkness
waiting to lunge at
another time

the apache kid