in a department store:
Bargain basement uppstairs

in a restroom:
Toilet out of order.
Please use floor below

notice in health food shop window:
Closed due to illness

spotted in a Safari Park:
Elephants pleasestay in your car

on a repair shop door:
We can repair everything. please knock
hard on the door, the bell doesn`t work

outside a 2nd hand shop:
We exchange everything, bikes washingmashines
etc. Why not bring your wife and get a
wonderful bargain

and a last one:
message on a leaflet:
If you cannot read, this leaflet will tell you
how to get lessons

:-)