I hate how you're clinging to me so I cannot breathe,
how you're making me contemplate about anorexia,
how you're making me more insecure,
more frightened
and more anxiety stricken
just because it comes so natural to you.

I hate the fact that I cannot loose you,
that you're always there,
surprising me
from the corners,
from behind,
even while looking into the mirror.

I hate the realisation that I cannot love you,
that when I meet your eyes my heart doesn't skip a beat
and when I laugh;
I do it to hide what I really feel
and sometimes I actually succeed - to fool me.