Cast of characters

Man Number One

Man Number Two

Man Number Three

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Scene 1

A place in the open air. Man Number One in worn-out clothes and a grey beret is sitting on a grey dustbin. Man Number Two in wotn-out clothes too but grey straw hat is standing beside him. A grey tree with only one green leaf is found a few meters away. Grey ground, grey walls.

MAN NUMBER ONE (sighing)

We’ve been waiting so long. Ever since… Yes, ever since when?

MAN NUMBER TWO (sleepy, in a slightly surprised tone)

Waiting? What’ya mean? Us two? When? Where? I’m so sleepy!

MAN NUMBER ONE (explaining)

We’ve been waiting here for a very long time. Wake up, young man!

MAN NUMBER TWO (waking up)

Ah, you mean we’ve been waiting here for a long time? Sort of…

MAN NUMBER ONE (pleased)

Yes, like I said. We’ve been waiting for a long time. And still, he hasn’t turned up yet. How come?

MAN NUMBER TWO (nodding)

Yes. It’s so true. This is not what I had in mind when a got here. Not what I had expected or been looking forward to. But things seldom go the way we want to.

MAN NUMBER ONE

Yes, I can agree to that. There’s no meaning to it. It’s rather weird. Much ado about nothing. Do things ever go the way I want?

MAN NUMBER TWO (looking at the tree; the leaf is falling off)

But what if he turns up? Then there would be some meaning. It’s end of fall now anyway. Wintertime. Getting colder. Can we wait any longer.

MAN NUMBER ONE

There’s nothing else to do but waiting. If we want to see the light in the end of the bunker.

MAN NUMBER TWO

You mean tunnel. At the end of the tunnel. Not bunker.

MAN NUMBER ONE (irritated)

Yes. OK. Tunnel. If you say so. Not bunker.

(A wind starts blowing from the left. The two men try to hold on more tight to their clothes. Shaking teeth.)

Scene two

In a room in a house. Grey walls, grey ceiling, grey floor. A window with the curtains down, pale winter sunshine through the narrow openings. Man Number Three dressed in neat blue jeans and a white shirt is sitting by a grey table with an old typewriter, typing, while Substitute by the Who is heard from a hidden loudspeaker.

MAN NUMBER THREE (to himself, momentarily not typing)

Well I wonder… I do wonder if they are still there. Still there waiting for me? It’s cold outside. I hope they’ve got warm clothes.

(He starts typing again, rather slowly, somewhat thoughtfully and carefully, but yet to the rhythm of the tune in the background.)

MAN NUMBER THREE (speaking to himself, sounding very pleased)

Yes, yes, yes! Finally I made it! I’m so good! I am the best! I hope they’ll like it! Well, where were we supposed to meet? Will they still be there? I know they were very keen on meeting me, and reading my piece… What if they’ve left the appointed place? I do think they’ll be waiting. They are two very loyal men, worth to be trusted.

(He takes out the last typed piece of paper and puts it as the last paper piece in his paper pile to the left beside the typewriter).

MAN NUMBER THREE (very satisfied)

Well, that’ll do! Let’s call it a day! Finally I think I’ve solved a problem that has irritated and been a pain in the ass to mankind for so many decades!

(He leaves the room to the left with the bunch of paper sheets under his left arm. The tune by the Who is ending.)

Scene three

In the open air again. The two men, the dustbin and the naked tree.

MAN NUMBER ONE (hopeful, jumping down from the dustbin)

I think he’ll soon arrive! I do think so. I mean, I am very hopeful! I can feel it in my heart. It’s beating faster and faster! Feel it! (He grabs the hand of MAN NUMBER TWO and puts it to the left of his chest) Boom, boom, boom…

MAN NUMBER TWO

I’m very hopeful, too! Soon our problems will be solved! (Lifting his hat, scratching his scalp). Isn’t it rather cold and windy?

MAN NUMBER ONE (in a happy voice)

Look who’s coming! I’ve always said he would turn up!

MAN NUMBER TWO

Yes, he’s a man to be trusted! Loyal and trustworthy! He’s my Man!

MAN NUMBER THREE (with a big, promising smile)

Hello, guys! Here I am. Guess you’ve been waiting for some time. But here I am. Your Man! Finally I’m here! How about that for a start? Or an end? The annoying problems of your meaningless waiting for me will finally be solved!

THE OTHER TWO MEN (simultaneously in one happy voice)

Yes! Yes! Yes!

MAN NUMBER ONE (very interested)

See what you’ve got! That pile of papers is looking rather promising!

MAN NUMBER TWO (in a mild tone)

May we read it right away? I’m so curious! You mean you’ve solved all of our problems once and for all? Or?

MAN NUMBER THREE (sparkling and proud)

Do read my piece! Take a good look and read it! I think you’ll like it! It’s a masterpiece. My very best! (Handing over the paper bunch to the other men. They are both grabbing it.)

MAN NUMBER ONE

I can read it! (He grabs it rather harshly.)

MAN NUMBER TWO (giving in)

Well OK. Do so! You’ve got a lovely voice for reading loud!

MAN NUMBER ONE (with big eyeballs, looking at the first page of the pile)

So this is the first page! I’ll start reading. You’re all ears, I suppose. (He starts reading very slowly and very solemnly from the first page in a sacred tone): “Finally Meeting Godot. Play in one act and three scenes by Göran Egevad.” (Looking up from his reading, surprised): But who the hell is that?