*click*
This is your captain speaking.
I\'ve been granted this time to share
a theory of ours.
We in the flight-crew have had some time to discuss this issue.
And the co-pilot and me have had words,
as far as we figure there\'s something special going on.
And as far as we\'ve come to understand,
life is magical and a power greater than anything out here.
and to test this theory of ours we\'ve been forced to take
... drastic measures.
Yes, we will crash the plane.
This is your captain saying
welcome to something brand new.
Signing off.
*click*
...
*click*
This is your captain speaking... again.
We would just like to take this opportunity
to congratulate Erica Wilcox in seat five-B
And Stanley Wilcox in seat six... umm... -B.
*whispering* ... is this right?
... and we wish you both a great life together
in the bliss of marriage.
*click*
...
*click*
This is your captain speaking.
The crash procedure will commence in thirty minutes.
We will hopefully land violently in the middle of the ocean.
You will find that there is no life-jacket under your seat and
that, when you crash, your seat-cushion is filled will lead.
... would not recommend using that as a floatation-device.

Oh and, one lucky winner in our plane-wide lottery has won a prize.
It\'s a bottle of jack daniels... and a straw.
We would sincerely hope you\'d take this opportunity to sedate yourself.
... it\'s gonna be messy.
Seat one-A is the winner...
Oh, that appears to be my seat... why thank you fortune!
Captain... *slurrp* signing off...
*click*
...
*click*
Yes... well... smoke \'em if you got \'em...
and... hell... do whatever you want...
cappy... off...
*click*

/