The blanket lies on top of life - heavy as the darkest cloud
I lift it up with all the strength I've got left, taking in air with
my bare hands, holding that air close to my body as if it would disappear
- and then, silently I close the book and in my mind, I move on.
I keep walking.

- I do not look back. Not even once.

As I wander into the woods, I notice how every step I take
is heavily depended on my pure force of will.
With the little energy that is left in me, I try to picture something that will give me the strength to keep walking. One step at the time, one breath at the time.

I wondered how the path would unfold as I was walking.
The trees make me feel both comforted and frightened at the same time.
All the sounds...The muted colors that are only interrupted by the
glorious sunset, probably viewed by someone else - some other place,
who finds it so beautiful they have to Instagram it.
I on the other hand, only see an - ending to this 'glorious sunset.'
An ending, a revealing of something, something unknown and somewhat
- loud.

My senses are like tentacles reaching out for that moment I've been waiting for, for so long, - that moment of who knows what. Not even I know - what, - perhaps I once knew, or perhaps I never knew. Perhaps deep down, I truly know what it's about. I might just be afraid of what I'll see, as when I watch those horror movies in the movie theater. Yet, I love the thrill. Not the gore. I like the suspense. I like the mystery. The detective work. The characters and the sound production. I sometimes even imagine myself being a location scout, just to get a chance to find and experience the perfect location. If there ever is such a thing as the perfect location, that is.

In real life, perfectly capable of understanding that everything is 'real life,' I find myself the opposite of what I am in my dreams and hopes, and well, what I truly wish I were. Perhaps I am all of those things? After all, it must come from somewhere, that desire, that hope, those dreams. I stop in the middle of the forest. The air is profoundly lighter and the sunset, now long gone and captured on someone's Instagram account, do no longer put a golden cast over the treetops. It is dark, cold and in some strange way beautiful. I wrap a warm scarf around my neck and shoulders and I sit down on a rock. I close my eyes and imagine myself being surrounded by all sorts of mythical creatures. It makes me a tad creeped out. Just like with the trees, that gives me the chills, with their old branches and tall raised bodies, and at the same time, it's like they want to comfort me, hug me almost, and take care of me. Like Mothe Nature, herself is holding me in her branchlike arms, letting the soft clouds act as a security blanket and the wind composing music that lingers in between the rocks and the grass.

Startled by the small flock of birds leaving their home in the treetops, I open my eyes and look around. Apart from the noise the birds made, the flapping of the wings, the treetops moving and the creaking sounds, it is comfortingly silent. Silence comes across as both soothing and disturbing at the same time. Which fascinates me. It has various terms of use, creatively it's a handy tool. So I sat there with this tool, wondering what to do with it, how to react to it, how to go about it. Maybe I should just get up and get started. Start walking - again. The pause had been too long, I thought, it had made me restless and more tired - there, again, another opposite. Just like in life, full of contrasts.

I took the decision to start moving again. One step at the time. One step further into the future. One step closer. Closer to - something. Not knowing gives me the creeps. And it thrills me. Contrasts sparks creativity. On so many levels. One step at the time. One breath at the time. You'll get there, I tell myself. Don't worry. You'll get there.

It is dark, cold and in some strange way beautiful.

I sometimes even imagine myself being a location scout, just to get a chance to find and experience the perfect location. If there ever is such a thing as the perfect location, that is. Right now, this is my location. I have to make the best out of it. Contrasts sparks creativity. Put that on Instagram. - Stand out from all of the millions of sunsets. Be the spark. Be authentic. Be on fire. Be your dream.
- Embrace the contrasts.