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the bad days

i call the days that i wanna die the bad days
you know the bad days where nothing feels real
like in a dream
the bad days where colors are not just colors
and names are not just names
the bad days when my body feels like a prison
but my body is the only safe place i know
the bad days where all your voices sounds like robots
and the clothes on my body is making me feel dirty
but no matter how much i shower i will never be clean
the bad days when i wish to be skinny
so i could be happy
the bad days that i no longer wants my body as a castle
this castle that anyone can walk into
and on these bad days i don’t feel like repairing myself from “anyone”
i bet they don’t even remember what my castle looks like
so why can’t i just forget them?
they will never come back, they can’t
but on the bad days they whisper in my ear
and on the bad days i’m glued on my own castle floor and they sit in my gallery and paint on my paintings just to make them so they like them
they can leave whenever they want but they don’t want to
how ironic




Fri vers (Spoken word/Slam) av E.L.V.E
Läst 106 gånger och applåderad av 1 personer
Publicerad 2022-02-02 21:45



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    ej medlem längre
just so you know
you are never
forgotten

people think of you
constantly
from around the globe

you know
i had 2 similar
questions
from two
female friends
that barely know
but still know me
the deepest
it seems

they both said:
"so why have you
stopped with the art,
the poetry, the music?
are you crazy?!"

now
they dont know my
internet personas at all
and we hadnt
met for ½ year

but somehow they knew
and enjoyed
all my creative creations
and i can only presume
they like all women
and cats!
live in superstring reality

so
yes
your pretend sand
castle in the sky
is still glistening
just as beautiful
you are just as
powerful as your
words and other arts
you need to keep
building your society

longo vivas tempore et bene sit!
lev länge och blomstra!
du blomma!
du blåsippa!
du köttätande fantastiska kalla!
ät! mycket!
och blomstra i former!
som din konst!
2022-02-03
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E.L.V.E