My boss tells me I should speak faster
just an offhand comment
that my speech is slow
not too slow
just enough
to matter

Maybe not slower than average
but just slow enough
for me to lose my courage
when talking about pay

Because he does not know
the causal mistake
because he cannot feel
how my inner child aches

The child who cried
body and soul in pain
the words, nested in the brain
to be repeated later
in the dark

The child who took lessons
in how to say the letter S
denying them more weapons
reaching for that blessing

I don't want to remember
the shame reaching back centuries
to the speech therapist
in her small room

"Sometimes you could speak faster"
he says
and I hug my inner child
while they clench their fists
impotently

because in a way I'm still there
part of me never left
the room, the corridors
violence
pain

I use to hate my voice
now I embrace it
how dare he reach back
through the memories
to the fear
the scars

Casual
just an offhand comment

Right?