Covered up in make up, glitz and glam. In high heels she walks with confidence - at least so it seems. Smiling -but not with her eyes. Crying when nobody sees it. Laughing when everyone`s there. Telling herself lies -making them seem right. She`s in a fight with herself from time to time, sometimes over a glass of wine, a glass she shares with the part of herself that she ignores from time to time. Covered up in make up, glitz and glam -one side is calm, the other insecure. - The argument keeps going on. `Who am I?`You`re nobody!`The little voice inside her said. `Who do I want to be?` `Where do the limits go for what I accomplish? `You are not gonna get anywhere anyway, -not you!`The little voice whispered. Then she realized that, that little voice belonged to herself. She paused the argument for a while. She had so much to be thankful for. God knew that. -She she told him that quite often.

She knows she has people around her that cares for her. And that she cares for as well. Yet she sometimes feels alone and sad -covered up in make up. Every now and then though not quite as often as before, past memories sometimes knocks on her door. She hesitates for a second, then she opens the door. Regrets opening the door, closes it, and finish her glass of wine. But the memories was already inside the room. She glances at them - analyzes them. She tries to smile. -Failing to smile. Covered up in make up she goes outside. Decides to give it a try. Give the sun a chance to warm up the part of her heart, that were about to turn numb form the cold shoulder she had given herself by ignoring the pain she felt from time to time. She knew that if she did not take her feelings seriously, she could not expect others to do so either. So she sat down on the bench outside her house, and told her heart that she was ready to listen to it. Ready to follow it by taking it seriously. The heart felt a relieved. She closed her eyes, and pictured the people she cared for. -There were quite a few, she had to admit. It brought a smile to her face -a genuine smile. Knowing there was people who cared about her as well. She gently removes the make up from her face. Her genuine smile was now revealing who she was meant to be. -A person that was happy with who she was. She had been given the chance to learn that no matter what she thought about who she `should be` , or wanted to be, -the only thing she was meant to be, - was happy. God had told her that many times, but she had always managed to let negative thoughts poison her mind. But not her soul. It had remained pure. Never covered up in make up. She took off her high heels and walked back inside and made herself a meal. Her appetite was back. So was her smile. After she had finished her meal, she picked up the phone and called one of her friends. - `I`m just calling to tell you how much you mean to me`, she said. -A silent moment. -`Thank you`. Her friend said. Another silent moment. -Yet she could tell that the person at the other end of the line was smiling. - `I care about you too.` Her friend said.

She smiled genuinely. - Peace at heart, peace at mind.