Do they see?
No, they don’t
I have been hiding behind a wall of mirrors for my whole life
What you see when you look at me is only you
And when I anger you, hurt you, make you sad
No one but you are responsible

Or so I tell myself, for convenience
Truth is that I don’t really know what’s going on
There’s a part of me that makes me lash out at people
Hurt them, humiliate them, make them doubt themselves
To treat people as I have been treated
As my pale, empty eyes turn black

In recent years I have attempted to silence this voice in my head
I couldn’t, so I turned it in on myself
And have since been keeping myself out of social situations
Embracing silence and dark corners
Where I can sit and hate myself
So that you don’t have to

I am jealous, yes
Jealous of all the people with friends
Smiling, joking, talking over lunch
People that don’t spend all their free time in front of a screen
Because they don’t have anywhere else to go
But I know that I was never worth their time to begin with

So I spend my life in loneliness and solitude
Dreaming of things that will never come
I have become very bitter and disappointed with what life has to offer
No that I wasn’t before, mind you
I guess that what I’m saying is that although I am still young
I have never really been young at all
Nor will I ever be